so...

I hit some kind of wall today. Do you ever want to just sit around in your pjs for two weeks? That's how I feel. I lost a really good friend yesterday. I went walking with Ryon tonight and I just felt like - he's got this girlfriend that's really important to him, everybody's got somebody that's special to them, and I'm sort of on the perifory (sp?) for everyone. Nobody thinks, "omg, I'm so happy! I have to call Kim!" or "omg, I'm so sad! I've got to call Kim!" I'm just realizing how bad I've screwed up the past few years and trying to figure out where I should go from here. I come home every day to this empty apartment and wonder why I do anything I do.