sad little men

Maybe everyone goes through this, but I've started to notice that men are getting more and more useless by the year. Listen up, guys, here's a few tips you need to know.

1) If you like a girl, and she gives you her number, fucking call her. If you don't have a phone....how old are you again?

2) If you meet a girl off the internet, and she wants to meet up, guess who's gonna be jumping in the car and at least going HALFway. You. That's right. Get your lazy ass out of your bathrobe, walk away from the computer, and get in the goddamned car.

3) Don't do shitty things, then beat yourself up about it, wallow in your guilt, then do the same things all over again. I'm sure the guilt helps you to draw lovely things or write lovely odes, or whatever, but write that shit, make your art, and then get the hell over it. Learn from your mistakes.

The person, really, who has to learn from her mistakes, is me. Bye, losers.